The Unintended Consequences of Striving for Perfection

A few months ago, I was interim-appointed to the senior leadership role within my department. Admittedly, I was excited about the challenge and accepted it wide-eyed. However, shortly after settling into the role, I began to experience heightened anxiety with certain situations and decisions. I found myself uncomfortable in previously comfortable situations and became increasingly aware of what the perceptions were of certain issues and occurrences. Suddenly, my new promotion wasn't so exciting.

After a particularly stressful day, I ran into my boss on my way out of the office and stopped to chat. As we ended our conversation, he said, "nice job today." Once I reached my car, I struggled to understand why he had such a different perspective on the day than I did.

I realized that at that moment, I had not only taken my eye off the goal but also set these unrealistic standards for myself and my colleagues following my interim assignment. I thought things needed to be perfect, and I needed to over-deliver to " do a good job."

Perfectionism can be defined as a personality trait characterized by a need for perfection and high standards. Most people would agree that striving for perfection is a good thing. After all, who wouldn't want to be the best at what they do? However, there can be negative consequences to this way of thinking. In particular, striving for perfection can lead to anxiety, overthinking, procrastination, and burnout.

Combine this with the "hustle culture" that condones overwork, which can be a recipe for disaster.

Pursuing perfection can:

Lead to Procrastination and Indecision

Paralysis by analysis is one of the most common consequences of perfectionism. This happens when you become so obsessed with making the "perfect" decision that you do nothing at all. When you're always striving for perfection, making decisions or taking action can be challenging.

You may spend hours or even days trying to decide on the perfect course of action, but because you're so worried about making a mistake, in the end, you never take any action at all. You become paralyzed by the fear of not making a poor choice.

Lead to Stress and Anxiety

Striving for perfection can be very stressful, especially when you're constantly putting unrealistic demands on yourself. We become overwhelmed and stressed when we're continually trying to live up to an impossible standard. When you inevitably fall short, you may feel like a failure. This can be extremely damaging to our mental health and can lead to anxiety, depression, mental health issues, and even panic attacks. I recently read that people who are perfectionists are often more likely to experience anxiety and depression than those who are not.

Damage Your Relationship

Perfectionism can damage relationships because it often causes people to be critical and judgmental of others. They become so focused on making everything perfect that they lose sight of the fact that everyone makes mistakes sometimes.

Breaking the Cycle of Perfectionism

To help change my thought process, I engaged with the EAP service offered by my employer. Through that service, I realized that I could perform better by keeping a few things in mind:

• Acknowledging that perfection is impossible. No one is perfect, and trying to achieve perfection will only lead to frustration and disappointment.

• Focusing on progress, not perfection. Instead of trying to achieve the impossible, focus on making gradual progress toward your goals and be prepared to make adjustments along the way. This will be more rewarding and less stressful than trying to achieve perfection. It will help reduce your risk of paralysis by analysis.

• Setting realistic goals. Don't set yourself up for failure by setting unrealistic goals. Make sure your goals are challenging but still achievable. This will help reduce your anxiety and allow you to focus on accomplishing your goals instead of worrying about meeting impossible standards.

• Taking breaks. When you feel overwhelmed or stressed, take a break to relax and rejuvenate yourself. This will help you be more productive when you return to your work.

• Accepting mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, so don't beat yourself up over them. Accepting your mistakes allows you to learn from them and improve going forward.

Final Thoughts

I'm now learning to focus on my team's goals and embracing the challenges that are teaching me along the way. I've also learned to take time for myself by setting non-negotiable boundaries for non-emergencies.

If you've struggled with perfection or working through hustle culture, share how you managed in the comments below!